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HERE ARE SOME WAYS TO MAKE A REALLY LONG AND BORING SERMON MORE FUN

- Pass a note to the organist asking whether he/she plays requests.
- See if a yawn really is contagious.
- Slap your neighbor, see if they turn the other cheek. If not, raise your hand and tell the priest/preacher.
- Devise ways of climbing into the balcony without using the stairs.
- Listen for your preacher to use a word beginning with 'A' then 'B' and
so on through the alphabet.
- Set in the back row and roll a handful of marbles under the pews ahead
of you. After the service, credit yourself with 10 points for every
marble that made it to the front.
- Using notice sheets or newcomer cards for raw materials, design, test
and modify a collection of paper airplanes.
- Start from the back of the church and try to crawl all the way to the
front, under the pews, without being noticed.
- Raise your hand and ask for permission to go to the lavatory.
- Whip out a hankie and blow your nose. Vary the pressure exerted on
your nostrils and trumpet out a rendition of your favorite hymn.
- Chew gum; if the sermon goes on for more than 15 minutes, start
blowing bubbles.
- Pretend to be 4 years old.
- Try to indicate to the minister that his fly is undone.
- By unobtrusively drawing your arms up into your sleeves, turn your
shirt around backwards.
- Try to raise one eyebrow.
- Crack your knuckles.
- Think about your chin for an entire minute.
- Twiddle your thumbs.
- Twiddle your neighbors thumbs.
- Wiggle your ears so that the people behind you will notice.
- Practice smiling insincerely.


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